I have a very personal pet peeve with people who blame others for their own feelings. For example, Person A does something with the best of intentions but happens to misstep and hurt Person B's feelings. Person B being hurt, views the situation as Person A purposefully hurting their feelings. This situation is an upsetting one to be in regardless of being Person A or Person B, and generally is due to a lack of communication. Generally I hope that Person A will express that it was not their intention to hurt Person B's feelings and a dialog will be opened in which bother parties can reconcile, and perhaps recognize a way of avoiding future misunderstandings. Sometimes though Person B, will respond that regardless of intention Person A hurt my feelings and should suffer for it. This is where Pet Peeve turns into walk away or at least divest for me.
I truly value my ability to step outside my emotions. To look at a situation that takes my emotions into consideration but is not dictated by them. This is an ideal and sometimes I do it better then others, but when encountering and dealing with people who do not share or even grasp the need for this ability, I become baffled. This Pet Peeve seems to highlight this overall insight. If I cannot trust someone to be consistent in their actions regardless of their emotional state, then how can I trust them with something as precious to me as well me. If I could be dismissed from someone I care for's life for an unknown period of time as a result of some lack of insight on my part on their current needs, and a misstep that hurts their feelings, Why would I possibly want to invest in being a member of their social circle?
The problem with life is that, you sometimes do not know until it is to late, and sometimes even once you do know you are stuck due to the relationship that person has with those around you.
This type of post as in most cases with those like it arises from a real world situation. A situation of which as it stands now needs to change. The problem is I am not sure how to do it, and have no where to turn to ask.
How do you deal with the emotionally centered people in your life?
